“I don’t know a perfect person. I only know flawed people who are still worth loving.” – John Green
It was in the Fall of 2006 that my life was completely falling apart…I had just moved to Los Angeles and had a job, so it didn’t look like my life was bad on the outside. What no one knew (but a few members in my family) was that my battle with anxiety had become more fierce than it ever had been before. Maybe it was moving and taking such a great risk that increased my anxiety…I’m not sure. All I know is that my Mom saw what I couldn’t see through my own fears:
I needed help.
She found an incredible psychologist who specialized in my specific flavor of anxiety – Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I was a wreck, but it terrified me to go speak with someone about my brokenness. What if they thought I was crazy? What if they didn’t understand and they made me feel more alone than I already felt?
It didn’t matter. Help was what I needed and help was worth the risk. It was in the first 30 minutes that I realized: this guy knows exactly what I’m facing and he thinks I’m absolutely normal. I’m not crazy. Other people are struggling with these fears too. I’m not alone.
I’m not alone…Isn’t that what scares us most when we’re faced with hiding our disorders or seeking help? We’re afraid that we’ll discover that we’re on our own? We’re afraid that everyone will abandon us?
It’s alright to ask for help.
You’re not alone.
You’re not crazy.
There are other people who are battling the same disorder as you, even if you can’t see it on the surface.
“If you don’t like where you are, move. You aren’t a tree.” – Unknown
No one dreams of facing a war with depression, anxiety, bi-polar disorder, and the numerous other mental and emotion struggles in the human journey. Yet, they can still find us, even when we least suspect it. How our disorders find us is not ours too choose, but how we respond to our disorders is 100% in our power to decide.
Are you battling a disorder? Ask for the right help. It’s not that you can’t talk with your friends and family, but be wise in the people in whom you confide. Not everyone is gentle with struggles they don’t understand.
What is the right help? For my journey, it was finding a professional psychologist who had dedicated his life to helping people in my disorder. I can’t diagnose you, nor can I tell you what you need, but you should never be ashamed to seek out the right help for your battle. You’re worth it.
We need you and your life is much more than the disorder you’re facing. Find help. Keep hoping. Never give up.